Immediately after the accident,
the Fully Automatic Egg-on-Rice Maker malfunctioned,
extracting your egos instead of the yolks,
and instead of putting them on steamed rice,
put them in each other's smashed bodies.
It made, not egg-on-rice,
Egg-on-Rice
Ego-in-the-Wrong-Device
but ego-in-the-wrong-device.
That wasn't funny, you shitty geezer!
Give them back! Give our bodies back!
You two needn't worry.
Now that it's been repaired,
if we use this Fully Automatic Egg-on-Rice Maker V4 once again,
you'll go back to normal.
Precisely!
This time, for sure, it will make the perfect egg-on-rice.
Forget about egg-on-rice already!
Basically, we just need to extract your egos again
and warp them, right?
Hey! Is this gonna work? Is this really gonna work?!
Gengai-sama, we're all set.
All right. Here we go.
Brace yourselves!
I'm a Failure as a Leader, and He's Also a Failure as a Leader
When using the Fully Automatic Egg-on-Rice Maker, please do so in a bright room and watch from a safe distance.
How's it look?
Confirmed warp readings from both transfer devices.
So it worked, huh?
Gintoki-sama, Hijikata-san, we did it.
The egos extracted from you came together to create this.
It's neither cat food nor dog food.
It's trash.
Are you kidding me?!
All you did was warp red bean paste and mayonnaise!
Who asked you to put our egos on top of steamed rice?!
You could say it's ego-on-rice.
Ego-on-Rice
That's not funny, damn it! And nothing's changed!
Huh? That's weird.
Why don't we give it another shot?
I'm counting on you guys.
Don't extract what's in our stomachs. Extract us!
Good. It worked this time.
Freshly extracted from you two,
it's g*nads-on-rice.
What part of us are you even extracting from?!
What have you done?!
My manhood!
Which ones are mine?
This one? Is it this one?
Wait, that's mine!
Nah. You're me right now, so yours are not mine!
Huh? Now I'm confused.
How are you going to fix this?
It's become some kind of super-complicated puzzle!
Don't worry.
One more try, and everything will go back to normal.
It'd better!
Take them from the right place this time.
And you'd better put them back in the right place!
It worked this time.
It's genuine trash.
Why would you put them in that?!
What's the meaning of this?
Why won't it work?
Gengai-sama.
Transfer device A is showing an error.
There was a critical deficiency in the target.
Apparently that's why the extraction failed.
Ginnoji,
it looks like you're missing something.
What are you talking about?
Please calm down.
For now,
hold this Buf*erin and give it another shot.
Was it kindness?
Was I missing half my kindness?
Are you stupid?
As if that'd be enough to fix it.
Take another ten with you.
Wouldn't it be faster to just transfer the Buf*erin instead?
If we don't figure it out, the device won't function.
Do you seriously not have any idea at all?
Did anything happen to you at the time of the accident?
At the time of the accident?
The cat's asshole!
Hey, wait!
What do you mean?
Basically,
the fragment of the fur ball that got sucked into the cat's asshole back then
was one half of my ego!
Unless I get it back and return to my whole self, we can't use that device!
You've gotta be kidding me.
That corpse must've been cleaned up long ago!
No, that's not it.
What if my soul made that corpse come back to life?
You look over there!
I'll check this way!
This has turned into a complete mess!
Well, well.
What a place for an unexpected run-in with a celebrity.
If it isn't the Shinsengumi's demonic vice chief,
Hijikata Toshiro-dono.
Zura!
This really sucks! I ran into the last person I wanted to meet in this form!
It's a bit careless to patrol all by yourself, don't you think?
I mean, this area is a Joi Rebel hangout.
There must be lots of people here who'd love to take your head.
Huh? Sorry, but I don't have time for you guys right now.
Step aside. I'll let you go this time, Zu—
Katsura.
What have we here?
Is the Shinsengumi vice chief
really going to ignore the presence of so many enemies?
Please don't disappoint me.
You're a policeman. Maintaining Edo's order
is your duty, is it not?
Wait, Zura—
Sheesh. Which one of us is actually defending Edo here?
Zura?
I'm not Zura!
I'm the captain of Odd Jobs Squad Three,
Captain of Odd Jobs Squad Three Katsura Kotaro
Katsura Kotaro!
Joi Rebels, who disturb Edo's peace,
Slay
are evils that must be slain immediately.
Evil
Immediately
I shall adhere to the Odd Jobs Code and bring judgment down upon them!
Uh, you're a Joi Rebel yourself!
Why are you in Odd Jobs now?
Why are you using the Gatotsu, too?!
I'm not the man I used to be.
When Gintoki turned over a new leaf and gained the resolve to discipline himself,
I decided to walk alongside him!
Uh, the guy next to you is the one you were trading Gatotsus with until yesterday!
Hijikata-dono.
You had Joi Rebels in front of you, and yet you tried to flee.
How can you call yourself a warrior?
Prepare yourself!
You may be a cop,
but you're no exception to our "slay evil immediately" law!
Hold it, Third Squad Captain.
This isn't the time to be messing with small fry.
We received word from one of our informants.
There's been an incident on Fourth.
We are to head there immediately.
They've even got bums who look like Zaraki now!
That intel is fake.
They say a talking monster cat appeared.
It's a malicious rumor that preys on the human heart.
I've mobilized the ninja squad already.
I'm sure they've dealt with it by now.
Just how big an army has Odd Jobs become?!
A talking cat? Is it a vengeful ghost?
I cannot ignore this.
To adhere to the Odd Jobs Code, I must bring judgment down upon it.
Third Squad, assemble!
We're moving out, you louts!
Slay evil immediately!
A talking cat?
Wait just a damn second!
Don't use the Gatotsu on that!
This can't be real.
How am I supposed to look for one cat in a huge city like Edo?
Damn it! If only I could use the police's information network...
You seem to be in quite a hurry.
Running late for a date?
Yer friendly neighborhood policemen
would love to give you a ride in our patrol cars
to a rendezvous in hell!
Kondo-san!
This sucks!
Why'd I have to run into such a troublesome bunch now?
Thanks, but I don't need your help.
Don't you policemen have your own jobs to do?
Get back to your duties.
Oh, but we are doin' our jobs.
We found a shady vagabond, so we're questionin' him, is all.
You're one to talk, shady sleeveless policeman!
I see your Shinsengumi Code has gotten rather lax.
Normally, you'd all have to commit suicide for neglecting your duties.
Hear that, Yamazaki?
Shinsengumi Code, he says.
That's centuries old, bro.
It's ancient history!
We're now free policemen, and nobody can hold us down anymore!
We swore to Toshi-san that we'd live by nobody's rules but our own!
Uh, what rules?!
Those "rules" are just whatever's convenient for you!
Keep listening to that lazy vice chief,
and you'll end up as good-for-nothings!
Shut yer mouth!
Toshi taught us that freedom is priceless!
He liberated us from our stifling shackles
and turned us sleeveless!
That's what you meant by stifling?!
Only your shoulders have been liberated!
I ain't gonna whine about you insulting our vice chief.
But you insulted our buddy.
Yer under arrest on charges of buddy defamation!
And sentenced to being dragged around the city
and then executed!
Gori-san, this isn't the time to be messing with small fry.
What about that alien thing?
You mean the tip we got about a cat alien on Fourth?
W-Wait!
A cat alien?
You fiends!
What do you think you're doing to our president?
Cops or not, if you act like barbarians and disturb public order,
we of Odd Jobs shan't let that slide!
Y-You guys...
What's this?
What are children doing here?
If you wanna pretend to be cops, take it elsewhere!
You're the ones pretending to be cops.
Because you cannot be relied upon,
we've had to maintain Edo's public order ourselves.
Bullshit.
Edo's the land of the free.
You'd better not keep screwing around on our turf, or we'll make you pay.
If you stand in our way, I'll have to adhere to the Odd Jobs Code
and hit your filthy face with a Gatotsu Kumon Stance.
How about you leave all your food and water behind and scram!
So neither of us is willing to back down.
Looks like it.
Which means
we'll just have to settle it with our swords!
Hold it!
All of you...
...sheathe your swords.
I order you as vice chief.
I order you as president.
Knock it off already.
I did tell you to slay evil immediately,
but are you guys incapable of identifying your enemies?
There's a limit to freedom, you know.
This is hardly the time to be fighting these guys, is it?
Show a little discipline and use your brains for once, you pieces of shit.
They're looking for the cat, and so are we.
We're both after the same thing.
Right, Gin-san?
In that case, we should put our swords away and cooperate.
Right, Hijikata-san?
Come on, Toshi.
What's wrong?
This ain't like you.
Things had just gotten interesting.
Why'd you have to get so damn serious all of a sudden?
Do you want me coming for your head again, Toshi-san?
If I may, President,
you're the one who advocated slaying evil immediately.
We were just following that.
Are you going to break the Odd Jobs Code that you created yourself?
Nobody's gonna take our freedom from us!
Not even you, Vice Chief!
We swore loyalty not to the president,
but to the Odd Jobs Code and our salaries!
Go!
They're not listening to their leaders at all!
Shit!
Take it easy, you guys.
I'm not telling you to make friends with them.
Just this once,
just for now, forget about your positions and work together to fulfill a common goal!
What goal?
The cat!
What cat?
The lost cat! We gotta look for it together!
Talk about hard times.
I can't even buy cat food with this.
Man, I'm starving.
Oh.
Looks like this really is no time to be fighting among ourselves.
Yeah. Let's put it off for now.
Men! Work together to kill that evil monster!
We must protect Edo from that monstrosity!
Now is the time to join forces!
That's not what we meant!
No! Don't eliminate it!
What the hell is that, anyway?
Why did your ego entering a cat's body give birth to that monster?
Wait, calm down!
Despite how he looks, he's actually a nice guy.
He's the personification of Buf*erin, full of kindness—
Who are you?!
Don't get in my way!
What part of him is a "nice guy"?!
You're screwed if you get beaten by your own other half, you know!
Don't falter!
Cursed goblin!
We must slay that evil immediately!
Do you guys know me, by any chance?
Eat this, you piece of shit!
Tell me!
Who in the world am I?!
I don't remember anything!
The only memories I have are of battles with lots of bloodshed
and battles with lots of balls!
Dear God.
He's not just my other half.
He's a big lump of the negative parts of me.
A sorry combat machine,
made of nothing but memories of blood-stained battles in war and pachinko.
That's just a lowlife!
Or, well, it's just you!
Your orders, President!
What are you guys doing?
Figure something out yourselves!
How, exactly?
I smell new pachinko machines over there.
Wait!
Shoot! He ran away!
Damn it!
I can't believe we lost to him.
Why?
Toshi!
We did everything as you said, so why?!
Because we're not your leaders.
Sorry
for being such worthless leaders.
Looks like they weren't the only ones not acting like themselves.
A free-spirited Shinsengumi,
and a disciplined and orderly Odd Jobs.
That's all very nice.
But don't you guys have a style of your own?
If the makeup of a leader can change an organization,
then the makeup of an organization can also change its leader.
They need your help.
But as you are right now, you won't be of any help at all.
You still haven't realized?
I guess that's understandable, because it is an unbelievable story.
Then let me teach you.
Tama!
Your leaders, and your true colors...
Put your bodies on the line
and go take it all back!
Where'd that freak go?
He definitely ran over here.
You get it, don't you?
Yeah.
These are the seeds we sowed.
We can't get anyone else mixed up in this.
We're gonna settle things ourselves...
...staking all of our pride as leaders on it.
There he is!
It's him.
Oh, no! He went into a civilian home!
This is bad. If that combat machine encounters a civilian...
We must stop him before things get any worse!
Huh?
Wait, isn't this...
Found him! He's over there!
Watch out!
Get away from him—
Welcome back.
You were out pretty late tonight.
Where did you go to play today, Dozaemon-san?
S-Some—
Dinner's ready.
Someone's keeping him as a pet!
There was a monster that domesticated that monster!
Hey! What's going on here?
Why is she with that monster?!
Don't tell me she mistook it for an abandoned cat and brought it home?!
She sees that as a cat?
She sees a creature that needs mosaic censorship as a pet?!
Dozaemon-san, I'm so relieved to see you're healthy again.
But his eyeball is popped out!
I was so shocked when I first met you.
You were lying on the street in a pool of your own blood, not moving.
Oh, this isn't blood.
It's just how my coat looks.
I never knew a cat could have fur like that.
That's not what you should be shocked about!
You saved my life by nursing me back then.
I don't know how to express my gratitude.
Wait, it can have normal conversations?!
Hey, what does that woman think she's keeping as a pet?
No need to be shy.
Shin-chan's been so busy with work lately that he hasn't come home at all,
and this place is too big for one person, so I didn't know what to do.
But I can't bother you any more than I already have.
I was thinking I should get going soon.
You're leaving already?
My wounds have mostly healed.
Besides, uh...
If people were to find out that a young, unmarried lady
brought a dirty stray home,
who knows what they'd say?
That's what you're worried about?!
Why not show concern about her bringing a monster home?!
If I stayed with you, I'd end up dragging your name through the mud.
I'd rather rot away than bite the hand that fed me.
You already have! What's with this guy?
Has he always been this chivalrous?!
You don't have to care about that, you know.
If there were rumors about, um,
you and me, would it really bother you that much?
O-Of course not!
Then stop worrying about silly things.
Right...
As the daughter of a samurai family, throwing someone with amnesia out in the cold
would bring me much more shame.
Until you regain your memories...
No, even if you don't,
you can stay here and make new ones.
You're already my pet, after all.
Milady,
I am forever grateful.
What the hell?!
Why'd those two turn into Takakura Ken and Baisho Chieko?!
I'm happy for you, my other half.
What are you crying for?!
What are you gonna do? How are you gonna get your ego back?
Baisho Chieko definitely won't let you!
Here. I put all my skill into making tonight's dinner, so eat up.
Thanks for the food.
Dozaemon-san?!
Wh-Who am I?
So that's how he lost his memories?!
Pull yourself together, Dozaemon-san!
Why did it end up like this?
Because of that toxic waste you cooked, that's why!
At this rate, your other half is going to stay a pet for the rest of his life!
Go persuade that woman somehow.
We don't have a choice! I'm you right now!
She'll think something's up if I go see her out of nowhere.
It'd be much more natural for you to approach her as Gin-san.
You gotta act like Gin-san and persuade her like Gin-san would!
You've gotta be kidding me! Why would I—
So you don't mind staying in the body you're in, then?
Y-Yo...
Otae, pardon the intrusion.
To Be Continued
Preview
Since you did it last week, I'll handle the preview this time.
Screw you! I'm going to nail it this—
I'm Odd Jobs, and He's Shinsengumi
What? Already?! The preview's too short!
Next episode previews can sometimes be really short, so take note.
The Gintoki and Hijikata Ego Switch Arc comes to an end next week.
Will Gintoki's ego manage to retrieve its other half?
It looked like Shinpachi and the others got run over. Will they be all right?!